Daniel Bates
  • Home
  • Blog
  • Podcast
  • Videos
  • Books
  • Schedule an Appointment
  • Speaking Engagements
  • Home
  • Blog
  • Podcast
  • Videos
  • Books
  • Schedule an Appointment
  • Speaking Engagements

Tag : counseling

HomePosts Tagged "counseling"

8 Ways to Regulate Your Emotions

by Daniel Bateson 30 March 2018in Emotion Regulation No comment

Emotions are the drivers for human action. They shape your experience as a human being. They can take you to the heights of pleasure, and to the depths of despair. Life without emotion is unimaginable, but what about life with uncontrolled emotion? Mental health professionals call this emotion dysregulation, which is feeling like your emotions are scattered, in constant flux, outside your control, and unmanageable. This is a difficult place to be, but there is hope. There are skills and ways of thinking that can enable you to regulate your emotions, putting you back in the drivers seat. Below are 8 ways to do this.

Continue Reading

10 Things To Do When You’re Depressed

by Daniel Bateson 21 August 2017in Communication, Depersonalization, Depression, Domestic Violence and Abuse, Family Issues, Grieving, Mental Illness No comment

Depression is a challenging, sometimes debilitating mental illness, but there is hope. It’s difficult to pull yourself out of depression, but following these 10 steps might make it a little easier.

Continue Reading

The 5 Characteristics and Benefits of Assertiveness

by Daniel Bateson 18 August 2017in Communication, Dating Couples, Domestic Violence and Abuse, Family Issues, Marriage, Mental Illness, Parenting, Premarital Couples, Reflection, Relationships, Self-Help, Shame, Therapy One comment

 

 

 

1. Aggressive—Assertive—Passive: People tend to fall on a spectrum of aggressive to passive in their style of communication and how they engage with others. An aggressive person is someone who believes they are entitled to take what they want. They are direct, have little regard for the feelings of others and don’t mind sharing their feelings. They don’t equivocate when addressing a problem or giving feedback. Typically, the aggressive person creates resentment in others. On the other end of the spectrum is the passive person, which is someone who ignores their needs, is indirect, is uncomfortable giving feedback, shies away from addressing problems. This style results in the passive person building resentment towards others since their needs never are met or addressed. Neither the aggressive or passive style promotes healthy relationships. When I work with clients, I recommend the assertive style, which is a person who can be direct and straightforward in addressing problems. They don’t shy away from giving feedback, advocating for their needs. And they do all these things in a manner that is diplomatic and respectful, but doesn’t deny or dismiss truth. The assertive person can communicate wants and desires without attacking others. Assertiveness promotes health in individuals and in relationships.

Continue Reading

9 Rules of Fair Fighting

by Daniel Bateson 1 July 2017in Communication 2 comments

No Shot Gunning: Shot Gunning is when you throw several objections, complaints or grievances at the other person, all at once. This simply is too much to respond to and isn’t fair. Pick one thing to talk about.

Cheap Shots: This is when you address a problem or give feedback to another person laced with critiques, personal attacks and button pushing. It’s not fair to mock and deride someone while trying to address a serious issue. It knocks them back on their feet and doesn’t lead to a positive resolution.

Continue Reading

Learning to Live Book Release!

by Daniel Bateson 10 March 2017in Book, Counseling, Psychology, Reframing, Self-Help, Therapy No comment

Learning to Live isn’t your typical self-help book. Learning to Live contains 20 chapters, each one like a mini session with an experienced mental health counselor. The chapters address a wide array of mental health topics. The central focus is to help you become unstuck and learn the lessons that can free you. However, learning is a process and sometimes you need expert outside help that can help.

So instead of spending money counseling session, pick up Learning to Live and reap the benefits of counseling now!

Learning to Live is available in paperback and Kindle on Amazon.

Continue Reading

Thinking Errors and How to Fix Them

by Daniel Bateson 29 January 2017in Counseling, Depression, Mental Health Disorder, Mental Illness, Psychology, Reflection, Reframing, Relationships, Self-Help, Therapy, Thinking Errors No comment

If you were out hiking and came across a stream, would you immediately start drinking? What if the water was contaminated? If the water was questionable, you wouldn’t drink, right? But you need water so what do you do? Many hikers don’t even worry about contaminants because they have filters, which take out the bad and leave the good. But what if your filter doesn’t work? How can you trust your water? Remove the word water and replace it with thoughts.

Continue Reading

How to Stay Grounded When Feeling Untethered to Reality

by Daniel Bateson 17 November 2016in Counseling, Depersonalization, Depression, Mental Illness, Psychology, Reframing, Self-Help, Therapy, Trauma No comment

thoedyph5hImagine feeling like everyone you know, everything around you, everything you are thinking and feeling is fake. That what you are experiencing can’t be trusted. And instead being in the here-and-now, you feel like a detached observer, watching yourself from a disconnected vantage point and there’s no way for you to reconnect yourself and reality. No, this isn’t the plot of Christopher Nolan’s movie Inception. This is a real phenomenon that people deal with everyday. And before you start thinking the experience sounds kind of cool, I can assure you, its not.

Continue Reading

This is How You Should Fight

by Daniel Bateson 4 November 2016in Communication, Dating Couples, Family Issues, Marriage, Parenting, Premarital Couples, Reflection, Relationships, Self-Help No comment

Couples fall into common pitfalls when they get into arguments. These pitfalls, although tempting to fall into, only create damage and hurt relationshiconflictps. Not listening, arguing to be right, attacks, accusations, bringing up past mistakes, and blowing up or shutting down feel good in the moment, but, in the long-term, they destroy loving relationships. Whatever the pitfall you find yourself falling into, change starts with you. You must lead the way to a better relationship by changing your conflict resolution style. Emphasis on the word resolution. When you have conflict, it should be done for the purpose of resolution, not venting your feelings ore inflicting pain on the other person. So, how do you do that? Here’s my practical, step-by-step advice on how to fight constructively with your partner.

Continue Reading

Counselor Spotlight: Marissa Talarico

by Daniel Bateson 13 October 2016in Business of Counseling, Counselor Spotlight, Family Issues, Interview, Marriage, Mental Health Disorder, Relationships, Therapy No comment

I had the great opportunity to interview local marriage and family therapist, Marissa Talarico. She is a gifted therapist who specializes in couples dealing with infidelity, anxiety, and family issues. She also specializes in sex therapy treating a wide range of challenges, including sex addiction. She sees clients at her office in downtown Vancouver, Washington. I had the chance to meet up with her for coffee and ask some questions.

marissa-talaricoWhat kind of counselor are you?

Theoretically I am trained as a marriage and family therapist. What this means to me is that I view your problem statement in a context. I look at not only where you are at now, and who you consider your family, but also the ways in which you were raised, what community you feel most closely tied to, and who you have in your life. I truly believe in understanding and hearing the whole person that you are, as opposed to only hearing about the problem that brings you into the therapy room.

How long have you been practicing counseling?

It seems like I have practiced as a counselor my whole life. From early childhood I often found myself in the position with my friends as the listener, the advice giver, the shoulder to bear ones soul to. Professionally I have spent my entire adult life in the helping services ranging from caregiving, working in memory care, to case management and counseling.

Continue Reading

When Your Loved One Is Depressed

by Daniel Bateson 6 October 2016in Communication, Counseling, Depression, Mental Health Disorder, Parenting, Psychology, Reflection, Reframing, Relationships, Self-Help, Spirituality, Therapy No comment

impact_on_family_and_tbi_istock_000000296911xsmall

Depression is a widely misunderstood mental health disorder. Depression affects people’s careers, sexuality, physical health, and emotional health. But one affect is often ignored because it lives in the periphery. Family, friends, spouses, children, and significant others are also greatly affected by their loved one’s depression. They too carry the burden of depression. Often, treatment only focuses on the individual, but what about those who care for them? What are family members and significant others supposed to do when their loved one is in emotional pain? How can they help? How can they care for themselves when caring for their loved one? These are important questions that are rarely discussed. Below you will find 10 steps to take when your loved is depressed.

Continue Reading
  • 1
  • 2
  • »

Follow Dan

Recent Posts

  • 5 Keys to Happiness
  • I Really Don’t Know Why I Do Couples Counseling When This Video Exists
  • Family Crisis Guidebook Now Available!
  • 8 Ways to Regulate Your Emotions
  • The Monkey On Your Back: 10 Ways to Overcome Social Anxiety

Recent Comments

  • Yonas belete on The 5 Characteristics and Benefits of Assertiveness
  • Scott on 5 Keys to Happiness
  • Daniel Bates on Gifts For Seniors To Help Their Health
  • raised toilet seat on Gifts For Seniors To Help Their Health
  • Daniel Bates on 9 Rules of Fair Fighting

Archives

  • February 2019
  • September 2018
  • August 2018
  • March 2018
  • December 2017
  • November 2017
  • August 2017
  • July 2017
  • March 2017
  • January 2017
  • December 2016
  • November 2016
  • October 2016
  • September 2016
  • August 2016
  • July 2016
  • April 2016
  • March 2016
  • November 2015
  • October 2015
  • September 2015
  • July 2015
  • June 2015
  • May 2015
  • March 2015
  • February 2015
  • January 2015
  • December 2014
  • November 2014

2017 © Copyright All Rights Reserved | Daniel Bates